When it comes to final destination, the first thing that came into my mind was "oh.. another bloody horror premonition" What will it be in this time round? From plane, train, fun fare and what? That's for me to find out.. So what come next? *It's imagination time!*

Let's start with.. ... I was sitting with my friends in the cinema.. looking forward for the long waited movie (final destination 4) to begin.. Just few seconds after the thought.. the lights went off and so the screen.. Blackout? Oh no, the movie started.. everything was going right.. until I was alert by the emergency alarm.. everyone was curious on what's going on, and so do I, but before we could figure out what's going on.. We heard cracking sound coming out from the ceilings, and next thing was the floor... they're shaking.. we can barely see anything in the dark... But we heard people screaming from far, saying "The building is collapsing.. " I was shock, squeezing through the crowd.. and trying to get to the exit.. and when I almost reach there.. a large piece of ceiling fell on me.......... argh... wtf... Heart beating fast.. thinking I'm going to die.. but when i open my eyes, I was surprise, where I am still sitting in the cinema with my friends.. waiting for the movie to start.. One of my friends spotted me sweating like shit and asking me curiously..

Friend: Hey.. what's wrong?
Me: We're all going to die.. I saw it! I saw it!
Friend: What?! Well.. is that a joke..
Me: No.. I just had a premonition.. the builing is going to collapse..
Friend: Well.. you wanna leave?
Me: Hell no.. I don't care.. I so wanna watch this movie!

*End of Story*

Ngek ngek.. interesting ya? You better say Yes.. or you're not going to the premiere screening with me.. =p

Posted on 12 of August 2009, rainy day, zhen's 18 birthday (From my personal journal)

"I miss you Zhen.. Happy birthday.. I love you.. I still do.." I whispered silently on my bed last night, imagining he was just right here with me.. Hugging me from back and singing me, my favorite lullaby (love - Nat King Cole).. I cried before I sleep, not long but I had a pain in my chest.. I don't know why..

I have never imagine me myself being in a mode like this right now..

I.. someone who was so close to you.. someone who was so dear to you.. someone who always care about you.. someone who always wish to be with you.. someone who never wants to forget you..

Why did I do to deserve all these? Saw you on facebook just now, saw all the messages you replied to those who wishes you "happy birthday".. Without a second thought, i open your chat window.. staring the small little profile picture of yours.. wondering, hesitating, struggling.. whether to start a conversation with you..

But then again.. the lilttle inside me stop me from doing so, but the feeling is so strong.. I hardly resist, I want to be with you at this moment, I want to know how are you doing, I want to know are you happy.. However, when I look back.. you're gone.. the only thing appeared on my sight was a "offline" word, but it sounded more like a "let go" to me.. It hurts, tears rolling down, but at the mean time, i feel release.. How ironic..

It's just a brief moment, less than 5 minutes perhaps.. But there were many things running through my mind.. thinking on how to start a conversation with you.. "hey, happy birthday?", "How are you doing ? =)", "Are we cool right now?", "Guess you still need more time".. and I realized that's all bullshit.. The only thing.. I wish to know is, "Do you still feel for me?" and the only thing i would want you to know is "I do, I really care about you"

Really.. we're both like passer by right now.. or may be worst? Recalling all those things we said "I wish we will never be like a passer by, when we part one day.." and clearly i still remember your words, "Babe.. That won't happen.." Can't believe it's happening right now.. Memory towards you starting to fade.. that's why sometimes It really makes me wonder, did we ever exist?

Last year.. I promised.. I will celebrate your 18 birthday with you
Three months ago, I was happily planning your birthday..
Last month, I realized my dream was crash..
Last week, I was thinking whether to wish you or not..
Few days ago, I was planning an outing with friends on your birthday, so i can draw my attention on some other things..
Yesterday, I dream of you saying "thank you" after receiving my "happy birthday" message..
Last night, I was asking Derek out for movie, so I will not have time thinking about you..
However.. when the clock strike 12a.m., I still wished you, "Happy Birthday".. but.. I left some words behind..

Special thanks to Brendan, what a lovely picture, yea? There are more, will update soon..

Memory of him started to fade, and that's what worry me the most.. His smiling face.. his gestures.. his voice.. his laughter.. his everything.. I couldn't remember it clearly.. What i can do is constantly checking on those messages he sent me, and the pics we took, the video clip i recorded.. and hoping i won't forget him so soon, remembering all the thing we've gone through and the sweetest moment we had.. I'm afraid.. but at the same time I ain't holding myself back..

I was being really frustrated over something just now, and after getting back to my room, i was thinking.. Why am i acting so? Is that worth it? and suddenly it jumps to another question, figuring way back.. how i get through this frustration. and this is where wei zhen comes in.

Yes.. wei zhen.. No doubt, I will give him a call if it comes to situation like that, well.. of coarse I can't do that anymore. So, I was thinking again, if he is still here with me, what will he say if I call him in this situation where I'm so fucking piss and feeling frustrated? He will.. soothe me.. lowering his voice to soothe me.. ? But how? How I get through all the frustration? I slowly forgetting.. forgetting how he used to soothe me,forgetting how we used to be so close.. Seriously.. It's slowly fading..

I knew someday it will have to end
I knew eventually I would have to go back to calling you friend
It's killing me that now that day has come
If it's for the best then where is this pain from
I know deep inside that this is what I had to do
but it's breaking my heart to walk away from you
I'm trying my best to appear strong
but it's hard when part of me says that in your arms is where I belong
I still love you with all my heart
that's not going to change even though we're apart
I was your classmate, best friend, first love

There are so many of our special times I'm going to miss
All the words I ever said or wrote still hold true
But for now from a distance is where I'll be loving you
I think you need me as a friend to help you through
because there are things I can't control that are hurting you
We both have issues no one knows of
neither of us had the strength to be true to our love
Maybe we will be together again if it was meant to be
but for now please don't stop loving me
Even though I'm not your girlfriend I'll still be here
With a shoulder to cry on or a sympathetic ear
The story of love can be quicker than the blink of an eye
But our story of won't be over until either one of us leave this world
Until We Meet Again