So, I thought it's time for myself to confront you. No doubt, it's easy making lies, but the consequences, living in lies we made is the exact opposite. Especially, to the person I care and love. I claimed that I love you, but I was wrong.. I love myself more, that's why I created lies.. all this while, I've been going againt my conscience.. and believe me, it's not easy, and there are time that I'm totally devasted...

“The worst lies are the lies we tell ourselves. We live in denial of what we do, even what we think. We do this because we're afraid. We fear we will not find love, and when we find it we fear we'll lose it. We fear that if we do not have love we will be unhappy.” ~Richard Bach~

...So, this is the the truth.. and I know it is hard for you to accept or see me as who i am again.. It is the same feeling when I'm trying to get myself back for the past few months.. It is very difficult. However, I know this need to be done, telling you the truth. All this while, I'm trying very hard to find a closure in our relationship. Sometimes, it hurts to think of you because every once in a while i really do still wanna be with you. People around me kept asking me to forget about you, ask me to get a life without you.. and i'm doing very well.. but some how.. the guilt left inside me.. I can't live happily.. not to the fullest, It all started because of you, and I hope it ends with you.. So here is the truth, and I hope I could live with a brand new me..

P.s. 心痛还得心药医，解铃还需系铃人