Mr.17 's action has started to makes me feel.. urgh... pressure, no doubt I enjoy his presence, but.. I don't know ... there are many things.. and I find myself hard to overcome each of them..

Last night, before i get carried away with my dreams, I had a short conversation with Derek, regarding the differences and how hard I'm trying to shape myself to be with Mr.17, and I concluded that.. being with him.. I can't be who I am..

So, Derek left last night, I didn't send him off.. because i thought it's better not to.. Well.. knowing that he had gone so far away makes me sad, because... ... ... OK, there will be no because.. after all I can still chat with him and see him on webcam, isn't it? Hmm... but i will definitely miss those late night movies.. suppers.. and.. many many things.. aww i'm so gonna miss him..

Let's talk about the dream I had last night, I dreamed of wei zhen.. by accident? It's weird.. it was about me bumped into him in a bar, and we're chatting and suddenly he brought up an issue about us being back together.. Well.. alright.. i think i'm turning into a lunatic here.. But what can I say? I'd miss him every single day..

Lastly, I'm a little puzzle with my mum. She asked derek about Mr.17 , and I'm thinking, why didn't she ask me instead of Derek?