Memory of him started to fade, and that's what worry me the most.. His smiling face.. his gestures.. his voice.. his laughter.. his everything.. I couldn't remember it clearly.. What i can do is constantly checking on those messages he sent me, and the pics we took, the video clip i recorded.. and hoping i won't forget him so soon, remembering all the thing we've gone through and the sweetest moment we had.. I'm afraid.. but at the same time I ain't holding myself back..

I was being really frustrated over something just now, and after getting back to my room, i was thinking.. Why am i acting so? Is that worth it? and suddenly it jumps to another question, figuring way back.. how i get through this frustration. and this is where wei zhen comes in.

Yes.. wei zhen.. No doubt, I will give him a call if it comes to situation like that, well.. of coarse I can't do that anymore. So, I was thinking again, if he is still here with me, what will he say if I call him in this situation where I'm so fucking piss and feeling frustrated? He will.. soothe me.. lowering his voice to soothe me.. ? But how? How I get through all the frustration? I slowly forgetting.. forgetting how he used to soothe me,forgetting how we used to be so close.. Seriously.. It's slowly fading..